Change... that's just the way it is, things will never be the same

Happy Sunday!! So this morning I'm finally getting round to some Carby ramblings and today this is me evaluating change in people's lives.

Some people change for the good and some change for the bad, only you can determine which category you come under and for me to evaluate my 24 years on earth, I know I've changed dramaticaly for the better. As a teenager I was hard on myself, at times I hated how I looked, felt I didn't have good relationships with my friends but looking back at my 14 year old self, I'm like URGH what a Jafooly. 10 years later, I've changed for the good but some of my friend's don't see that. Many of my friend's have changed and I can't say for the good or bad but things happen in life; some of them have children or long term partners and whilst they have their responsibilties, so do I. As a blogger for www.iammusic.tv I need to dedicate time to reviewing musicians and events, so it means I sometimes have to turn down offers of evenings out, and as a music loving, party hard bitch it's a struggle finding time to meet up with my baby mama's as their body clock is in a completely different zone to mine (they are used to getting up at 5am, when some day's I don't rock up hom until that time... usually sporting a hangover.)

I have a lot of friend's, some that I've known since Primary school, some from Secondary, a handful from places I've worked and then there's just the random friend's I've made on nights out that were too good to let go. As we grow our interests and ambitions differ, so where I was hanging out with my still very good friend Yaisa 24/7, I don't see her half as much as I used tnoo. She's become my gym and cinema buddy, whereas aged 16 and armed with fake I.D, she was my partner in crime and we did everything together. But by our 20's she was being to get bored of the party lifestyle and we both saw less and less of each other. It's not a bad thing that we're not as close but it is funny how things change. My other friend Kirsty think's that I've changed and that I don't make time for her anymore but I still love her as much as I did as that crazy loud 16 year old shoutin BOGIES down the school corridor. I think she has changed too but this isn't to say whe's changed for the bad. Kirsty is now a mummy and a fiance and when I celebrated her daughter's christening I was proud and shocked at how mature she now was, she looked a different person with this air of grace and womanlyness.

So this is just a blog to say that we will all encounter change, whether it's a change in friendship, a change in personality, in interests and careers. At the beginning of 2012 I was doing well, I had a respectable job and took my family for granted. In April my grandfather passed away, a few weeks later my dog also passed away and then a few month's later I lost my job. Things in life are sent to try us and I've got a lot stronger from all these events. I miss my grandad and dog more than anything but all I can do it continue to be grateful for the life that I'm living. I hope that the people I've known for years will continue to come along on my rollercoaster ride that is my life and just hope that all these struggles will soon pay off.

Sorry if none of this make sense but hopefully you will take from it whatever you want.

Bless x

Rihanna shines bright in the video for 'Diamonds.'

Finally the video for Rihanna 'Diamonds' is here. Hip Hip Hooray! Apparently I'm the 303rd person to view it but with 36,007 likes that could be wrong.

What can I say about this video? Whenever I hear a brand new song that is yet to have a video, I mentally shoot my ow video in my mind, so for me I saw lots of diamonds... in the sky of course, lots of sparkle and maybe a sexy co star for her to wrap herself around.

This is yet another beatifully visual and stunning video from Rihanna but then it would be wouldn't it. Rihanna sings in a field with wild horses running around her, walks through riot police with a dirty face and sings huddled in a living room with floating objects. The video reminds me of 'Take Care' which features Drake, with random shots and in 'Diamonds' we witness burning roses, tattooed arms, Rihanna smoking reefa and Ri Ri floating in the sea all by herself.

It's random but I love it, so go and see what the fuss is all about... also she looks hot as always.

Oh Rihanna, can you do no wrong?

Written by Vanessa Carby

Ouch my ears hurt!

This could music video from Tara Palmer Tomkinson could well be the worst video I've seen all year! The video for '5 seconds' seems a bit of a piss take and if you ever watched Smack The Pony back in the 90's you'll get where I'm coming from. The thing is her singing voice isn't that terrible but the faces she pulls and her amateur acting falls short.

For the lady that has everything and probably the longest running British socialite, I wonder what possessed Tara to record this song. Perhaps she is a woman scorned or just felt fit to splash the cash and embark on a music career.

'5 seconds' makes me love 'Gangnam Style' and I quite disliked that. Have no fear because I'm certain this will not make it onto Radio 1, Kiss Fm, Choice Fm or Capital Fm, and it definitely won't make it into the charts... unless she buys every single couple. I feel bad for Tara because she comes across as a nice lady but when you're making Geri Halliwell, Victoria Beckham and Jessica Wright of Towie look like Rihanna, that's telling you something.

Don't give up the day job, whatever that is honey.

Peace. x

The girl who was 3 boys!

Firstly! What the absolute fuck? Are teenager's these day's completely
 stupid?  So if you didn't watch Channel 4's 'The Girl Who Was 3 Boy's,' you missed a topical delight because not only was i shocked and baffled but i had to head straight to Facebook to vent my bewilderment. This girl Jessica created 3 male alter ego's with 3 different styles and personalities, somehow duping her 2 best friend's into believing she was a teenage boy. She invested hours of creating facebook profiles to groom her 2 best friends but how could they not tell it was their best friend of 2 years? I feel like teenager's desperation for a boyfriend or girlfriend is sinking to low... back in my day we'd hang around the Bentall Centre or the Trocadero but these day's teenagers are just chatting on MSN. Are you dumb, naive or both? People don't always seem like they would have you believe online. But back to the victims... What made me laugh was that Jessica (he/she) duped her friend not onze but twice. The girlfriend's never quized why their boyfriend never took his phone off and never noticed the un- canny similarities between all 3 boys. Now I'm an inquisitive women and I'd like to think I'd notice it if my mate of a afew year's was dressed as a boy... Otherwise I'd move country out of shame.

You can understand why one of the victims chose to have her face blurred! Now sorry to get a little bit grimey but when Jessica aka Cona, Aaron and whatever the other fake lad's name was tried getting some sexy time with one of the girls, she striked lucky and used a friggin dildo on her. Even if you've never used one in your life, how would you not notice it wasn't real... Unless this pretend boyfriend had splashed the cash to get a top of the range one. And what about the girl that got done over twice? She said when the guy she thought was a guy started touching her down there, she told him to stop, bear in mind her nan was downstairs. Would you or would you not scream the house down if a guys was being a bit too much? Or maybe it's just me and people know I won't take sh*t!

I feel bad that I didn't actually feel bad for the victims, they say it sounds crazy but he/ she had everything on point- the dialect, the walk, the clothes but still, I can't believe you wouldn't bé able to tell a boy from a girl. The programme finished with me ranting about how desperately teens of today must want a boyfriend. I know people of 17 that have had more boyfriend's than me but the fact is, it's because they're not fussy. High five to my dad for telling me to ignore boy's until after university. Sorry dad, i may not have lasted until university but you did leave me with lasting morals. I decided after the documentary that my children, failing common sense, will not bé allowed on facebook and MSN without major safety measures. I'll also bé inviting the boyfriend/ girlfriend and their family to my humble abode so I can quiz them (I'll leave the lie detectors at Jezza's) but to bé honest my children will bé savvy like me.

URGH! Foolish children.

50 shades of Zzzzzzzz

I probably should read the blurb of this erotically penned 3 part hype before I knock it (so bear with me as I get to grips with it ;) There we go, I'm done!

Now just the other day as I was huffing and puffing my way onto the tube home, I spotted a lady in her mid 30's holding a kindle and sporting one hell of an aroused face... it makes me chuckle every time i remember and I would have bet a tenner that she was reading 50 Shades of Grey. Good for her that I have no hard evidence that she was reading this story but for everyone else reading it with it's evidentially obvious front cover, a sense of embarrassment shudders through me. A few of my friends have warned me that I will be expected to read the trilogy and far from being a prude, I will read it, I just don't like jumping on the band wagon and even at it's 3 for £10 price tag at Tesco, I'm still not over- joyed.

Friend's had read the instalment's in the same amount of days which makes me think 1) you're either sex deprived 2) have nothing better to do 3) are just really really really kinky and into that whole Mills & Boon drivel.  I reckon it would take me at least 3 days to read one of the books (and before you knock me for having the reading span or abilities of an 11 year old, I'll have you know that I've always enjoyed reading and was top of the class... I'll have myself to believe anyway's.)

It's probably that I'm just a bit bored of EVERYONE talking about it and people's statuses about wanting a Mr Grey are cringing me just a bit. I'm not cussing people at all, I'm glad it's got the nation reading and it even inspired myself and a friend to word our very own erotica story whilst casually working out in the gym; we thought it would be the perfect place to set a hot and steamy sex scene and we continued the innuendos until we couldn't contain out laughter any more! Like the Harry Potter books that I left untouched as a child, I'll be waiting for this sought after book to hit an Odeon near me... someone once told me this would be a bad idea and would be worse than reading the book. Well I say bring it on and I know what I'd rather be doing than reading this book and I think the majority of men would ask their wives and girlfriend's to put that sh*t down and come upstairs!

Peace x

The frown of brown

Recently I’ve wanted to get on a sunbed and I have done so in the past, but not for a roasting and not for vanity’s sake. Instead I would happily risk the UV damages as it helps clear scars that I’ve incurred through having severe eczema. I do fear of the dangers of getting skin cancer but it seems that there’s always something lurking around the corner. I couldn’t get over the news story that broke about the overly- tanned US woman named Patricia Krentcil. 

I think we’d all be in agreement that she looked grotesque or like she’d had some fun rolling in something we shan’t mention. It’s clear that we as a nation as obsessed with tanning and being mixed race I’m lucky to have a tan all year round but friends don’t get why I sometimes fake tan… well I tan for precisely the same reason that a white person would, for that extra glow and people when summer is fast fading, so is my glowing complexion. H&M are now being heavily criticised for their bikini ads and I’d admit that I’ve looked at the campaign photographs and thought to myself “damn that chick is dark,” but at the same time I found myself drooling because in my opinion she looks hot. I’m not that naïve so I’m awake of airbrushing and I’m aware that her mahogany tan is more than likely painted on… still I can’t help but lust after that colour (of which after a week, I actually get that dark.)

So whether the ads encourage the use of sunbeds and unachievable looks, I see no major issue with them.

 It’s not like H&M are putting turbo delux sunbeds next to their changing rooms, is it! People are free to tango themselves if they feel they look pale and those that embrace their natural colour… Big up! These days tanning salons have increased their prices, making it a lot less affordable for school kids to visit.

Don't hate her coz she's beautiful- Do the pretty girl rock

Sometimes a man will hold the door open for me, buy me a drink, pay for my cab home even but unlike Samantha Brick, I do not glorify myself as being ‘beautiful.’ It’s great that she has so much confidence in her looks when so many women put themselves down and strive to alter their looks with surgery and make- up but mate, you need a wakeup call. When the Daily Mail story broke and I was faced with a picture of a blonde lady, I simply shrugged, she wasn’t ugly but she definitely didn’t make me go “C’OR BLIMEY.” I could persecute her, which I did initially because it was amusing to do so- I said her teeth were awful and she has a massive spam. Am I right or am I right?

She say’s friends dropped her because they couldn’t contend with her looks, hmmmm, they probably dropped her for another reason, irrelevant of her looks. When I drop female friends (which isn’t often) it’s usually because we’ve grown apart, they’re a compulsive liar or simply a right twat. I have many girl friends that I class as being significantly hotter than me and although there could be the odd occasion that I get a case of the green eyed monster, I don’t hate them because they’re beautiful. Time to find some ugly friends maybe? Nope, it’s no biggie. Maybe that’s why I have so many friends and get on so well with females, because I don’t have a huge ego, perhaps it’s my lowered self confidence that put’s me on a level with them. I’m not skinny, I’m insanely tall and have my flaws but I’m grateful for my differences, sorry Samantha, I promise you I would not give you a second glance! Maybe we could for lunch next time I’m in France but don’t get jealous if me and your husband hit it off, I’ve been known to have that effect LOL.

Here’s a memo for you Miss Brick, women don’t hate you because of your looks, and they hate you because your smuggy attitude stinks. Of course women are jealous of other women or perhaps let’s use the word envious, that’s life. I think this woman deserves her own warts & all documentary to see if everything she claims is true… She shouldn’t be surprised if she gets a few ‘bricks’ through the window from insanely jealous women after her article. She’ll never know now if women are giving her dirty looks because she’s a sexy mamasita or just because they think she’s a prized pillock for her arrogance!