Feeling as High as a Kite

What is this feeling? I feel a bit like a big freak for how happy i am feeling and why I'm soo happy, I'm not entirely sure.

Let me go back to about 2 or 3 weeks ago when my friend Soraya had mentioned a book called The Secret by Rhonda Byrne.

I had never ever heard of this book, so it was suprising and a big coincidence when I went to a Disney Audition and a girl in the queue line started talking about the book. I thought this was too good to be true and bought the book asap.

The book doesn't look like much but trust me, it feels like my bible and if anything it's a great book to live your life by: Think positive, live like you have what you want or are wanting to achieve and become.

The book is generally a wake up call and a kick up the backside and I won't tell you all the things the book (i feel) as helped me with but here are some:

-To have £5,000 by august this year: I won bingo the other week and had a tiny win on the lottery the other day.

-To get back to my target weight: I haven't weighed myself but I've been updated with comments that I've lost weight and I'm looking good; which is a massive ego boost.

Those 2 are ones that I feel have happened within 2weeks of me reading the book and though to some critics it could be a load of ball, for it to work, you have to believe. It also says in the book that whatever you wish for could take from a few days to a months.

One that I'm waiting to happen is:

- To be a TV Presenter

So what else is making me sooo happy? Well I'll be reunited with my friend Gaida, who moved to Barcalona a few weeks ago. I'm going to visit her which will be such a wicked experience.

I'm working on a university newspaper and it came out yesterday with one of my articles featured inside. It was a struggle getting it all done and I had my ups and downs but the feeling I get from having an article in print is just amazing. I feel like a real Journalist.

As I write this the sun is shining. High School Musical 3 came out and its a great happiness boost and Lady Gaga is inspiring me. She's just a cool lady.

So I hope that everything will start to feel as happy as me. I feel so grateful for life at the mo... how cheesy and if your not feeling happy then only you can change that.

If your still not convinced by The Secret then I might post some quotes from the book to inspire you.

Love the Diva

x x x

BEST NIGHT OF 2009 SO FAR!

PUSSYCAT DOLLS LIVE AT THE O2

with Lady GaGa and Ne-Yo supporting

Wow, how do i begin?! You can probably tell that I'm overwhelmed because last night I went to the best concert of my life. Not only were my favourite people of the moment playing (Ne-yo and Gaga) but my inspirations were headlining. Me, Corall, Soraya and Hais were all pumped and ready for some doll domination; we were dressed as our fave feline ladies and every song was known to us.

You know when people say that they are number 1 fans? Well, I really am!

I think what I like about these women is that they promote: ladies being independent, being strong, sassy and they encourage confidence (whether that be in appearance or sexuality) who doesn't think these ladies are hot? Both men and women do! They inspired my weight loss and as performers I inspire to be successful. PCD are sometimes slated for being too raunchy but in this society, what isn't slated? I was actually shocked at how many young girls that where there and the whole experience gave me a deja- vu feeling, like i was getting to see the spice girls ( with PCS's girl power, uplifting vibes)

I think they are amazing role models and men see them as eye- candy.

The 5 girls consist of lead singer Nicole, Melody, Ashley, Jessica and Kimberly... and I always hear people cuss them and say that they're not as good live but I can now defend them because they blew me away with their powerful voices (we even experienced all of the girls as solo artists and I was impressed.) I kinda felt emotional at the end of the concert because they were better than I could've imagined, the best £32.50 I've ever paid, worth every single penny and like when I saw on the news that concerts and theatres are still killing it, with people attending even in our money crisis. It is no suprise because for a couple of hours all our cares were forgotten and I was on a natural high.

I could probably go on about the girls forever because I'm sooo (don't even know the word for how im feeling) but I love PCD's songs, their stage outfits, what they stand for.

I'm even thinking of starting a Tribute Band (NO LIE, LOL)

I think a new obsession has begun!

Pussycat Doll's Album is out now:

Doll Domination. and it's gonna be one of my fave and most cherished albums.

It's bursting with attitude, smooth groves, pumping beats and it's gunna be my new bible. We should all follow what they preach in their songs because life would be so much sweeter.

LOTS OF LOVE,

THE DIVA

X X X X X X

Are you having a Merry Christmas?

Hay peeps, this is just a quick not to say "I told you so!" This is refering to my last blog on how i hate christmas and christmas hates me. It all kicked off in my household around 12 in the afternoon... earlier than usual.

The routine was kinda similar to any other xmas: we woke up and opened presents (i got an 'I LOVE XMAS' mug.. oh the irony) (mint fudge) & ( anti- masturbatory gum... RANDOM). That all went quite well but sadly i didnt really wanna be up as i'd been out the previous night, had drunk a heap of toxic drinks and walked 1hr home with aching feet because the friggin buses don't run (who's the genius that came up with that?)

Next I watched 'My Fair Lady' with Audrey Hepburn (such a good film) and from lazing on the sofa my sister advised I should go to sleep.. I did but later on my beautiful neice was screaming and crying for what seemed like 30minutes so i got a bit peeded and took solace in my living room. I made some comments that my neice was annoying me and her mother was less than impressed.

From that ridiculous scrobble, I have ended up alone and upset in my bedroom, what made the situation worse was that I commented on FaceBook that my sister had made my xmas exactly how i expected it... an upsetting and isolated one. The comment wasn't even as bad as it could've been but what's been done, has been done and now my 27 year old sister has made her feelings quite clear that she wishes to never speak to me again.





Hopefully I won't get another eash bashing for writing this but writing helps me stop feeling numb and stops me crying.


I really had hoped this year would be different but i think from next year I'm going to elope abroad. I must have that season disorder when you just hate certain times. I don't even like christmas dinner very much... it's gonna be about the alchohol from now on!

Drink and be Merry as they say, but I really hope that somewhere out there someone is having the perfect xmas.

Enjoy your holidays.

Love, the Diva

X X X

Bah Humbug to Christmas!

This scene says it all! People rushing out to buy last minute gifts, a stressed and peed off cashier, no one looks happy!

It seems every year christmas starts earlier and earlier, don't get me wrong because there are a few things I do like about Christmas, those being a few Christmas songs, decent presents, some alright movies on telly and some food and drink. For all the good things though, there are alot more bad things about it.

Rubbish X-mas songs, rubbish gifts, spending loads of money, drunk relatives, busy shopping centres and massive queues, brussel sprouts and those a just a few of my bad points.

My local, decent town centre in Kingston- Upon- Thames put up their decorations over a month ago and my local high street truned on their dismal lights which consists of tinsel and fairy light strung around the street lamps last week. It looks so pathetic and is a waste on our electrical resources, LOL! And they talk about GLOBAL WARMING!

My loathing of Christmas started about seven years or so ago, before that time I loved it and being the youngest of the family I revelled in getting what gifts I had asked for, going over to my nan and grandad's, stuffing my face with good food and playing games.

How times and puberty have change my family traditions, I hit the Kevin & Perry stage in life and I can admit (because I'm told so often) that I'm ungrateful. Yeah yeah whatever (as I used to say) Can I help it if there are certain things on my wish list that I wanted, can I help it if i get some smelly bath product... which I always end up using straight away just so that I can get rid of the damn thing. What can't be helped is that times change and things have become expensive. I understand fully now that my mum buying me a £60 camera would be appreciated but its not gonna help if that £60 pays two bills. I am in no way spoilt but I just want what I want!

Like my friend Yaisa says, "Christmas is for Children!"

Just writing about Christmas has got me all depressed, I can confess that I'm a Scrooge! There, I've said it! I'm glad that I can be excited for my neice Maisie spending Christmas with me this year, hopefully then I won't be throwing the tantrums, rather she will be and may I add she's only 3 but she's a diva in the making. Learns from the best.

Christmas these days doesn't feel like christmas and I wish that it was how it is potrayed in American films. If I had my wish we'd be sipping eggnoc, wearing terrible knitted reindeer jumpers, singing carols by the fire and unwrapping the most fabulous girfts from under our 8ft christmas tree, oh yeah, and it would defenitly be a white christmas. Snow can make or break the day, it will probably rain.

So here's me hoping for a better christmas, praying that I don't get annoyed or upset by one of my sisters because it's usually them and never my brother. Here's to good food and drink and a nice film to keep me occupied!

If all else fails and christmas is a terrible disaster, you'll find me in my bedroom.

HO HO HO, HO HO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Love The Diva

xxx

Wanting to shift those flabby bits? ME TOO!

You can clearly see my belly overhang. EURGH!

My face looks bloated and fat

I actually look pregnant and my thighs are super chunky!

Christmas is drawing ever closer and so are my fears of stuffing my face with gateux, quality streets, stuffing and turkey. I'm not the biggest fan of christmas but I am the biggest fan of food. I love food, i love looking at it, smelling it and eating it! I don't even have to be hungry to eat, nor do i actually have to like the food i'm eating. Thats's how bad I am.

But after christmas comes and goes, we're left with the evidence= chubbalubba faces and bellies!

This year saw a big transformation for me... I actually shifted that stubborn weight now I feel alot happier and healthier.

It took me 4 months along with the help and support of my friend Alison who also wanted to lose weight, WELL DONE ALISON! Want to know our secret? drum roll please... WeightWatchers.

So if after christmas and New Year, you find yourself making the same resolution as always (Must lost weight) then actually do it because I'd said the same thing for the last 5 years and finally I've done it.

I must add that the hard bit is keeping the weight off, after going on holiday and snacking on chocolate crepes, ice- creams, gyros I put on a little bit of weight. Then came halloween and at work it was a dieters nightmare, I scoffed profiteroles, chips and dips, gingerbread, marsmallows.. that was in just one day.

"There's a fat lady dying to get out of me!"

Trust me, it hasn't been an easy journey but I'm confident- ish that I won't put on all of the 37lbs that I lost. I'm just trying to say that quick fix diets and crazes are not what you should be doing because they really don't work. Me and Me sister sara were constantly looking up the next diet and I nearly tried the maple syrup diet (as successfully used by Beyonce) but then i admitted to myself in the beginning that I obviously wouln't be able to do it.

We are real people with normal lives to lead and turning up to work with a litre of maple syrup concoxtion just aint gonna happen. Let's face it we can't resist a treat, so if your serious about making a change to your life and figure, I really do recommend WeightWatchers..

It's the ONLY thing that's ever worked for me!

Good Luck to anyone trying to lose weight!

Love, The Diva

x X x

And what do you do???

You know when your talking to someone new and that question comes up, you don't want the person to end up bored.. "I'm a student," and "I'm an entertainment host.." what the hell is that? These are the two job titles I tell people and the same ones that I enter in job application forms. some of you may think (BORING!) whilst some of you will definelty be saying the same (the student part, anyways!)

I'm not ashamed of being a student, not at all but I would like to be more interesting than that and hope that all these years of essays, stress, assignments and tears, will not have been in vain.

I'm getting to the age where soon enough in society I should have THE career, but hold on for one second.. I'm only 20 years old and I have a long life to lead (I'm hoping). When we take our GCSE's we're supposed to have it all mapped out in our minds, well, in less than 6months I will have completed my journalism and creative writing course and will be left to my own devises of finding that money making job and I'm not even sure if i want to be a journalist anymore.

It all sounds like alot of hard work and the public will only think I'm a liar because whenever I tell adults of my career choices they laugh and say, "Journalists are liars..." "...lying scum." etc etc etc!

Let me give you the long list of jobs that only seems to get bigger with time.

JOBS? songwriter- tv presenter- police officer- dancer- music/ fashion journalist- P.A

DANCER?

and that's an up to date list!!!!

TV PRESENTER?

Am I naive in having such high hopes when the closest one I believe I could achieve is: Police officer.

It's good to have dreams and to have ambition... I've always been ambitious but I can't help but think I'm in way over my head.

The media is going to be a hard industry to crack but I am determined.

So this is my cry, my plead that whatever you do in life, you over strive and think the impossible, coz like the saying goes...

"It's better to have tried, than to have never tried at all."

~ Elbert Hubbard (1856-1915)~